Friday, October 19, 2012

Notre Dame is 6-0

I've not posted much about football this year, which is weird, since ND is doing fucking awesome and last year I was constantly posting about heartbreak.

The Irish are 6-0 mostly because of their amazing defense that is lead by Manti Te'o. 

It will all probably end next week in Norman against Oklahoma, but right now, its perfect.

And Manti is hot too.

I Remember Love


I was incredibly bored at work, since now I’m training someone to take my job, so she does everything and I play on my phone. I wanted something to read, so why not blogs. I remember when I first found blogs, I would sit and read them before class or well even during class on my fucking T-mobile Sidekick. It was mid 00’s, when I think I found some golden ones that I’ve never really been able to replace. I think its because I related to these two blogs specifically for a few key reasons. I had body image issues, a dry sense of humor, found only purpose in going to the gym, and similar world views. Vividblurry is gone for good, the blog is now a place holder for ads, which sucks, I would have liked to go back and read it. London Preppy is dead, well not really, but now he writes really good books like Exit Through the Wound. LP definitely helped shape some of my interests like prep style and Bret Easton Ellis, and his blog/story was really enjoyable to follow. And with my aversion to try anything new, I somewhat lived through his stories about going out and his far more interesting experiences. He had a boyfriend after all.

I’ve been second guessing this choice to join the Navy lately, like….should I’ve really given up being a trainer for this? Granted, I wasn’t happy in Middletown, OH but will I be happy here in Monterrey, CA either? I had it pretty good back home, had a job I liked and a man, well sorta considering he was bisexual closeted case. I just felt like nothing was happening, but maybe I should have tried more to change that than just up and run away. I was talking to a friend earlier that the issues I had seemed to follow me here, so really what was gained?

I went for a ride with a guy from the Army earlier this week, met off an online site. We drove around, and talked, so I got a feel for him and then we fooled around, so I got more of a feel for him. I was trying to get some idea about what he liked…and it quickly made me realize that this was not going anywhere. He was closeted and bi, and not nearly hot or interesting enough for me to keep that up, and was apparently only into blow jobs. I started feeling sick, mostly because I rushed out of the gym after a workout to meet up with me and I needed to eat. My body saved me again.

My shoulder is back to normal, though I never stopped working out, so go healing factor.

I really want out of that admin job, going to have to hope they let me go on Friday and not wait right until the day I class up.

Chris hasn’t returned a text in a few weeks, probably will stop sending them for good. I didn’t expect things to go on anyway, but he was one asking about connecting again…

I really have an issue with being passive aggressive or being honest, one of those two things.

I’m not looking forward to this linguist training fucking up my gym routine…but failing out isn’t an option either.

I miss my training clients.

I got a Tumblr

And thats why this died, I'm sorry.

darkeyedresolve.tumblr.com